Spork Up Your Life

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*Em reporting for duty! Hola, this edition of Sporkful features The Spice Girls. I loved the Spice Girls when I was little, and I still do. Ginger Spice is my favourite, in case you wondered. Anywho, they’ve gotten back together, made a new song, and they’re going on tour. A tour that has sold out already. Their new music video is… interesting, to say the least. It starts off very mature, very classy. The music starts, but don’t ask me to tell you how it goes because it’s nothing special, Baby Spice is singing solo. Then they all join in, including Geri (Ginger Spice!) who is just standing by the door, minding her own business, wearing nearly nothing except her 12 PACK ABS. Somehow it just doesn’t fit, the wind machine adds another level of weirdness to it. They’re inside a huge mansion, why is there wind? Then we see Posh Spice wearing what looks like a bathing suit that got stuck in a blender. She’s doing what she does best, AKA looking posh. As Michael Buckley of the What The Buck? Show pointed out, when it’s her turn for her solo it looks like she’s even forgotten how to lip-sync. I like how you can find all their old videos now on their new YouTube account, we didn’t have cable when I was a kid for the most part, so I never got to watch their music videos. It’s neat to see them now.

But let’s forget about them now, and remember them the way they once were. Hot, young, and everything I wanted to be. Looking back, I wonder why. Apparently I wanted to wear no clothes? Their music was all I ever listened to, I flocked to magazine stands to see if Bop (or whatever it was called) had any posters in it. I have to admit, I still really like their music. I mean, the poetic genius of “Yo I tell you what I want, what I really really what, so tell me what you want what you really really want” gets me every time. Seriously though, it’s fun just to dance around like a fool, I think it’s good for you. Their songs are catchy, cute, and I’m happy that they’ve gotten back together for a bit. Now, I have to go shake it. Because if you can’t dance, truth is you can’t do nothing for me baby *bursts into song*. What is with Geri suddenly switching languages in the middle of “If U Can’t Dance” though? I always thought that was weird.

-Hanna Em

*AB here. I have to admit, I was a hardcore Spice fan. I was Baby Spice!! My friends and I had our own little Spice Girls group. It was mega fun! Although I have to admit that I…was expecting something more..FUN! and IN YOUR FACE kinda music. Like there old stuff. But of course “they’ve matured” and whatever. I was hoping for all the up beatness and dance music for they’re first single. So, I am a bit disappointed. I just have to point out, at the beginning of the music video Posh’s hair is..you know all posh and normal. But by the end of the video it’s all nasty and greasy because she KEEPS RUNNING HER FINGERS THROUGH IT! 15 times! I counted, and how much time does she get on that video, like..maybe almost 45 seconds chopped up. And that means she did A LOT of hair flipping. Also everyone, but Baby Spice, ends up at least half naked by the end of the video clip. I wonder what audience they’re trying to reach out too? Anyway, even though they’re still not the Spice Girls I once fell in love with, I do like they’re songs, and I think I need to go dance to them like the 10 year-old me once did!

-AB

Here is the video for their new song Headlines (Friendship Never Ends):

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